Eyeball Adventures
26 Jun
You know not to spend a fun Thursday morning? Having your eye swabbed, it’s not so much fun. Blowing bubbles would be fun. Eating fairy floss would be fun. Playing on swings would be fun, but having your eye poked? No so much…
I went to the doctor near my house (Uni Doctor is on holiday and I couldn’t wait any longer) about my eye this morning. Long story short, he doesn’t know what it might be, a couple of possibilities were tossed around including EYE HERPES. The fuck?! This must be my punishment for taking humor from the concept of eye chlamydia, I’ll be the first to admit that I am hardly a shining beacon of maturity but certainly an eye STD is a bit harsh a punishment?!
The doctor took some swabs from my eye and I should have an idea by tomorrow what is actually wrong, if it’s not better by Monday I will need to go to a specialist. Eye swabs are just great, you take a dry cotton stick and poke it around in the eye that already hurts trying to get some stuff on the stick. I, obviously, had trouble keeping my eye open when it was being poked but it only seemed to make Doctor more determined to poke harder. I don’t know if you can milk a cornea, but I suspect he was attempting it. I think I prefer my corneas un-milked.
It shouldn’t be conjunctivitis because the drops I’ve had should have fixed it, it shouldn’t be herpes BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE THE HERPES VIRUS and it shouldn’t be allergies because I haven’t gotten anything in it, and it’s only one eye and generally both eyes are allergic to something. It’s a bit bizarre, even Doctor said it’d would be very unusual if it was one of those things, because of those reasons. Particularly the herpes, generally you need to get cold sores and stuff to get eye herpes, but I’ve never had a cold sore in my life. Eye herpes causes these ulcer type things on your eye ball, so that would be another good reason why I’d prefer not to have it. Yesterday my eye just ached, it felt like someone was trying to scoop it out with a spoon, and the light was starting to hurt it which is also not a promising sign.
I have eye drops for the moment, then depending on my test results I have two other medicines to get and if none of those work I assume Monday will be spent going back to the drawing board. It’s a little bit ironic that the people I lived with in the bush, the guy had a false eye because he had an infection in his real eye that would never clear up and they ended up having to take it out. His false eye is amazing, it looks so real and moves around and everything, I was incredibly impressed by it. Is it bad that I’m more alright with the idea of having an eye removed than I am with my wisdom teeth being removed??
I miss mascara ;( Go away fez eye disease, I want to wear make up again!!
$100 says you DO NOT have eye herpes =) I promise !
It is disturbing it has been lingering for so long though….maybe some of my magic chick weed cream will work =P
Best, $100 says I am NOT putting that shit in my eye.
Well, won’t I be laughing when I collect my $100 eye herpes money, I will convert it to pounds so I can afford a small cappuccino in London at your expense!!
LOL! I know this was probably not meant to be funny but you had me in stitches with your comments and reluctancy to have an STD in your eye.
Fingers and eyes crossed for a speedy, uneventful recovery.
Beckie, if you can’t laugh at someone when they have herpes in their eye, when CAN you laugh??
Glad you enjoyed it!
Sweets that sounds AWFUL. I hate anyone going near my eyes, I can’t even have anyone apply mascara for me, I have to do it and even then I blink like crazy and my eyes water.
I hope it gets better soon.
Steph, I hate other people putting eye makeup on me too but at least MUAs normally go in quite gently he was pretty much just worried about getting some eye cells…at all costs.
It’ll be right!