Tastes Like Spam

Hello, [Hi, just a note for next time. When you offer someone 19 million dollars you should probably address the email using their full name]

I am Kun Chun, a permissible practitioner. [Wouldn't you call yourself a lawyer, or an attorney or something? Permissible Practitioner makes you sound dodgy]A departed patron of mine, that shares the same last name as yours, died as a consequence of a heart correlated situation on January 12th 2005 [It took over five years to get in contact with me?! Does a permissible practitioner really get that much work!? Also, I've got a pretty Caucasian last name, I suspect there isn't many people, much less entire families, who share my same last name]. His heart situation was due to the passing away of all the members of his family in the tsunami catastrophe on the 26th December2004 in Sumatra Indonesia. [I can see how that would affect a person] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2004_Indian_Ocean_earthquake [How thoughtful to include wiki entry for me, this makes me reassured they are legit]

I am contacting you to request your permission to present you as the recipient to my late patron. He has a deposit of (US$19,000,000). [I have concerns with this, not least of all is the fact I am not even a "he". I feel this will make the task difficult]

This will be accomplished under a justifiable pact that will shield you against any permissible implication. [A pact?! Why don't we just go ahead and pinky swear on it?] If this dealing suggestion affronts your ethical principles, do acknowledge my request for forgiveness.[Note that he doesn't give you an out should it affront your ethical principles, he just apologizes for it]

I can be reached on: kunchun2@gmail.com

Kun Chun.

Attorney At Law.

[Why not just call yourself that in the first place]

This is one of the better spam emails I’ve been sent. It’s relativity coherent, not glaring spelling or grammar error and bonus points for not being somehow related to a Nigerian prince. I do appreciate the unique ideas, sharing the same last name? Tsunami related? Nice work.

I’m was almost tempted to email back…then I remembered I don’t give a shit.

Happy Monday!!